Let me tell you a story about the corrupt company that goes by the name of Gold's Gym.
But first, let me give you some background as to why I joined this gym in the first place:
When I left for my trip to Jordan in 2009, I weighed somewhere between 125 and 128 lbs, and was in decent shape. Fast forward to the end of my trip....I'm in Israel, staying at the BYU Jerusalem Center, just after the Jerusalem Center students left because the semester was over. It was the end of my stay in Israel and I had just packed up. There was a scale outside my room that I used to weigh my luggage. I also used to it weigh myself one day, and when I saw the number 143 on there, I had a miniature heart attack. I actually thought it was wrong. I knew I had gained weight, but no way could I have gained around 15 lbs in 4 months.... Either way I knew I needed to whip myself back into shape as soon as I got back into the states.
Before I move on, I feel the need to defend myself and my rapid weight gain. Exercise was not easy for me in the Middle East. I hate running, so that was out. And the local gyms had "girls time" (recall that I was living in a country where men and women are more or less segregated at times) and the "girls times" were always so inconvenient, so I opted not to get a gym pass. We did a lot of outdoorsy things, so I got some exercise through hiking and whatnot. But that period of time was the most inactive of my life. Also, we went to Egypt first, so that was my first exposure to Middle East food, and I haaaated it. I thought I was going to come back home skin and bones because I thought I was going to starve because the food was so gross. The very first of the food I consumed in Jordan after the infamous awful "Ferry Day" (I don't want to talk about it, it was that miserable), on the other hand, was DIVINE. After about 8-9 hours on this stupid ship that was not our original ship and was also supposed to be like a 4 hour trip (that would be because we sat on the ship for 4 hours and then learned that we HADN'T EVEN LEFT YET) we were treated to a lovely dinner, and I instantly knew that I instead of coming home skin and bones, I was going to have the opposite problem. I would post before and after pictures, but the difference is best seen in a before picture of me in a bathing suit and an after picture of me of pretty much any of my pictures in Israel. Not my most photogenic days.... Anyway, I feel uncomfortable putting myself on a before and after display like that, so if you're that curious, go Facebook stalk me.
Well I got back to Provo around 2 or 3 AM, and got up early to check into my room in my apt. That day I headed straight to Gold's and signed a contract. Just to clarify, that would be less than 24 hours of being in the States. I was that desperate. Checked the scale, sure enough the scale in Jerusalem was correct. Eventually, I made my way back down to my normal weight and here we are, 2 years later.
A little more background, but about what happened to the Gold's on 9th E. in Provo:
This didn't affect me, because I had already moved up to Salt Lake. But the gym on 9th had PHENOMENAL classes. For spin classes, we had Mike who had a rockin body (too much muscles for my preference, though) but was a total airhead. Either way, he played great music, and kicked our butts and made class time seem to go by in 2 seconds. Christi was this olderish lady, but not old old. She was another favorite, also awesome music, also great class. Thursday nights Nikki taught. She was pretty terrible because she didn't make us work very hard, and everything was on a slow beat, but I still liked the class because I just sped everything up and also Thursdays were always long days for me so I didn't really want a kick your butt kind of class anyway, just something to burn some calories. Annnnd then we had Janae. WHAT AN AWESOME TEACHER. She blogs here and has quite a crowd of followers. I think I'll hate every spin class for the rest of my life because she was just that good, no class will ever compare. I also really enjoyed the Mon/Wed night power pump classes. All in all, it was a jack pot for enjoyable weight loss and heart health classes. And guess what? Corporate turned it into a $10/month gym and canceled all classes out of the blue. Like maybe 2 weeks notice, if that. The teachers were called up and told they were all fired. Well, some had classes at other area gyms, but if not, too bad.
The company isn't suffering. It isn't hurting in this economy. Remember how Six Flags starting charging people to hold their bags at the rides? And frustrating that was (still is)? Well that company either went or almost went bankrupt so they were actually just trying to stay alive, financially. Gold's on the other hand....just wants to maximize profit at any cost. Pretty shady business, yeah? Well that's Gold's for ya. And this is only the tip of the iceberg. Head on over to their Wikipedia page, and you can read about how someone actually successfully sued the greedy a-holes at one one of the Provo gym locations.
Ok well there are no good classes in the Salt Lake area. Every teacher plays terrible music. And don't tell me to go to Zumba, I suck at Zumba. I like Zumba. Zumba is fun. But I don't get a good work-out because I can't ever replicate what the teacher is doing and I end up staring at all the really good dancers like the creeper that I am. I've tried a million spin classes and they all start out with "ok so let's do a 30 min climb..." Me and Mary found 3 classes that we like, 2 of which are back-to-back at the same gym. Well actually Mary found 4, because she does happen to like Zumba. I actually fashioned my work schedule around my gym classes. Yes I did. I have to drive 25-30 min on Monday during rush evening rush hour, and a full 40-45 min on Tuesday during evening rush hour to get to these classes. So me and Mary were at our Monday night boot camp class at the Sandy south gym just 2 weeks ago. Last week a friend had a bday at a Thai food restaurant and you better believe I won't say no to that. So we show up tonight only to discover that ALL CLASSES AT THIS GYM HAVE BEEN CANCELED.
WHAT.
THE.
EFF.
No notice. Not within the last 2 weeks anyway.
Ummm hello Gold's you send me junk email all the time, you definitely could have sent out a courtesy email: "oh by the way, just in case it concerns you, we're transforming the aerobics room in Sandy south gym into a cardio cinema because we're douchebags and could care less about customer satisfaction. So eff you and goodbye!"
Best part? I just re-signed my 2 year contract yesterday.
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After all this complaining, I should mention that it might just pan out to be ok. I still use the gym once/week right now for lap swimming, and plan on upping that starting this week to 2-3 times per week. I also love love love the power pump and kick box class at the West Jordan gym on Tuesday nights. And supposedly there's a bootcamp class at the West Jordan gym at 530 on Monday nights. It just sucks because that's the gym that's a forever long drive away. I'll just bring my gym clothes with me to work I guess and it won't seem as bad because I'll be half-way there. But that's assuming it'll be a good work-out. I haven't even tried it yet.
Gold's Gym is a corrupt, disgusting company. I've been willing to overlook that for the past 2 years because (a) I originally decided to sign there because that's where all my friends went, and we all know it's good motivation to have a gym buddy, and (b) the Utah Valley gym classes were so great I didn't care that they are blood-sucking crooks. Oh and it didn't hurt that I only pay like $21/month, which, for Gold's rates, from what I hear, is not bad, compared to other members anyway.
I had a different blog post in mind. Something a little more cheery and upbeat. Something about how I enjoy licking all the alfredo off my plate before my nice waitress takes it away from me and how it's embarrassing when as she's taking it I instinctively and tactlessly reach forward with my bread to hurry and get one last lick of the heavy cream and cheese which pretty much negates the purpose of every single word of this blog post about exercise woes.
But I suppose I'll save that for another day...
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